So, I’ve been wondering all day, what would Emily Post, the Queen of Manners and my go-to resource for how to be graceful and gracious in every situation, do in this one?
A young man and his father, Joe Smith and his dad, Mr. Smith (yes, I changed their names) are friends with my dad, who lives in the same house as I do. Joe and I used to be friends as young teenagers, but have since drifted apart and now I can’t bear to be in the same room with him. My mom, who also lives in our house, has no problem with either of them, but in reality it is my dad who is friends with them. So, my dad is going to be away for the week, but has invited Joe and his dad to come and visit us even though he’s going to be away. My mom and I are, shall we say, NOT anxious to play host to them, especially with my dad away, so finally, my question:
Is there a nice way to say “We know you were invited, and we don’t have a legitimate reason to say no, but we really really don’t want you to come over with my dad not here since we’re not your friends, he is, so why don’t you come by when he’s here and we can greet you at the door then run away”? And if there is, what is it?
Please let me know what you think. Admittedly, when Joe asked me again if they could come by, I didn’t answer immediately. After a long silence from me, he asked if that was a bad time, and I said that it was, that everyone of interest would be unavailable. Of course, I didn’t say we’d be unavailable because we don’t want to see them and we’d all hide behind things when they arrived, but still…
If anyone wants to search the official Emily Post Institute website, or the latest edition of Emily Post’s Etiquette, and see if there is a specific protocol for something like this, please do, and let me know so I’m prepared next time this situation arises.